Can You Open This Pickle Jar For Me?

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Can You Open This Pickle Jar For Me? is a Patrice O'Neal video about the downsides of being a stay-at-home dad.

Rusty Knife called in and said he'd been married five years and that he had two daughters. He said his wife was forcing him to stay home. Patrice told him, "Don't lose your fuckin' balls like that." He said, "The amount of time that it takes for her to pussy you up is the amount of time that she sticks around to enjoy you being a pussy. So if it took her five years to pussy you up, she's gonna stick around for five years to enjoy you bein' a pussy. And then she's gonna leave you."